Emmett's diary
by evaernst
Summary: Emmett is depressed and Esme comforts him. ONE-SHOT


Summary: Emmett is very depressed and Esme comforts him.

Emmett's diary

The first school day in the new school year:

"Good afternoon, my name is Smith and I am your new English teacher for this school year", said a young woman with pinned up, blond hair, who reminded Emmett anyhow of Rosalie.

"Because I am new at the school and I don't know you yer I would ask you to write for me a description of yourselves until the next lesson. There your appearance should be described, you can report about your family, about your animals or what you distinguishes as a person and what makes you unique,"

"You mine a little bit like a diary?," asked Rosalie and, however, did not at the new teacher instead she looked at Emmett.

"Yes look at it how you want. Beside that I would be very glad if you would looked at me when you are talking with me," said Miss Smith with friendly expression, nevertheless, with cold voice. Rose slowly turned round to her and looked at her piercingly. Miss Smith looked immediately frightfully. One more teacher who was afraid of her.

On the way home:

"I don't like her," meant Rosalie and made a grimace.

"Oh come! Don't be so strict. Nevertheless, she only tries to make everything right. She isn't able to do do something against it and I think that she is not even half as nice as you" Emmett tried to explain. This was his standard speech Rosalie taught him. Thus it went for every year.

"What do you write, actually, in your diary?," I changed the subject fast.

"Do not know," she answered short. It was unambiguously offended and I considered fast whether I a part of her praise speech had forgotten. It had been everything inside.

"I still do not know what I should write. Maybe I write about us. I mine how much we love each other and things like that", told Emmett and steered his huge car to the drive of the Cullenhouse.

Emmett really had no idea what to write. Lately he hardly felt like an independent person. He felt like everyone just bounced him around and he always had to play the servant. If someone told him one year ago that he would feel like that today so he had probably faithless shaken his head. He always felt so strong and he believed to be invincible.

As well as Siegfried, he thought, he was after a bath in dragon's blood inviolable expect of one place on his body. I have such a place too. My heart

Then Emmett tored himself together. He had to be careful with his thoughts if he was near Edward. He parked the car in the garage and then he and his wife went in direction of the house.

One week later, midnight:

Emmett sat alone in the sitting room and tried to write his homework for English. Thousand ideas whirred in his head if I thought about it honestly, they were not honest. Anyhow I had the feeling that I should answer this homework honestly. He could not explain it and also makes generally no attempt to do it. He tried to form sentences in his head to, however, all the same however he turned and turned them they always sounded awkwardly and wrong. The others went hunting but he said he still had to do his homework and would not come along. He looked out of the window. Outdoors it was floor-morose and softly small snowflakes sailed to the ground.

Suddenly he heard the front door shut and automatically stood up. Few seconds later Esme stood in the door frame to the sitting room.

"What do you do here? I thought you went hunting with the other?," asked Emmett amazedly.

"I was, however, I suddenly had the strong feeling that I were at the wrong place and urgently had to go home," she told and sank beside me on the sofa. "Would you maybe like to tell me something?" she asked a little shyly, however, openly.

"I'm sorry: I still have to finish this English homework for tomorrow," he said and she nodded knowingly.

Emmett started to work again. He tried to ignore that he wasn't alone any more, that somebody was beside him. However, he did not know why he had the feeling that she exactly knew what depressed him. He shook the head and tried to come back to his thoughts again. Esme had got herself a book and was already lost in it.

"what do you think abour me?," asked Emmett suddenly and looked at Esme piercingly.

"How do you mean this?," she asked a little confused.

"What do you think about me?," he repeat and added then, "of my character? What makes me special?,"

Nevertheless, his mother began no praise hymn on her son like he expected she just looked at him.

"I know exactly what you are feeling," she said then, "you feel bounced around and humiliated. You believe you've lost yourselfe," she whispered and took his hand and pressed it.

Emmett did not answer instead he just sank his head. If he could he had cried. She had met exactly his sore point. His heart. It was as if she could read thoughts. He laid his head on her shoulder and she tied the arms round him.

"So answer my question please," told Emmett his mother.

"Emmett I really love you and you are very important to me," began Esme and leant her head against his. "You are something quite special. I know that you believe that nobody sees thar but that's not right. I know it, Rosalie knows it and all the others, too,"

"I don't believe that. In any case, they do not treat me as I would be something special," Emmett rumbled a little sorrowfully.

"I know it. But Emmett this is their way to handle such things. And they love and also respect you. Believe me. A mother knows things like this," smiled Esme.

"Do you really think this?," asked Emmett to convince himself completely.

"As I already said: I know this," she answered and storked his hair. "And to answer your question: there are many things which make you special. Your character. There is nobody who can make you laugh and can listen at the same time. You can comfort people and help them,"

"But there I am not the only one. Edward is also able to do this," replied Emmett and sighed.

"Maybe, however, Edward is different than you. He is much more serious. You comfort people while you make them laugh and tell them to hang in there. Edward comforts while he shows that there a still other ways. Both versions has their positive and negative sides and, nevertheless, everybody is unique,"

These were, actually, relatively simple words and, nevertheless, they worked anyhow miracle. Suddenly I felt awfully because I knew that it was true what she told me.

"How do you know that?," he asked nevertheless.

"I know you already very long. Emmett only because we are vampires that doesn't mean that we don't have our human sides. Everybody needs love and security. I have noticed your change during the last weeks," Esme told him.

"You noticed it and why didn't you talked immediately with me?, "Emmett asked," this would have spared me lots of grieve and thinking,"

"You feel better now?," asked his mother and smiled warmly.

"Yes. Thank you. I sometimes do not know what I would do without you,"

"Nothing, probably," she laughed and storked his shoulder.

Emmett started roaring and Esme joined him.

"Don't accept everything. Defend yourself against them ," she said and wanted to stand up.

"How did you noticed that I didn't feel well?," asked Emmett with the rediscovered curiosity.

"Just simply say: I was in a similar situation like you are now," sighed Esme and she seemed to remember a time long ago.

"What do you mean?," asked Emmett and looked at her amazed.

"Oh you know this time is over and I prefer to live in the present," she said and left the room.

Actually, he was very interested what his mother meant and, nevertheless, he let her her private sphere. She was right: they lived in the here and now and there was something else to do.

He ran out of the house into the forest.

"Rose," he roared, "I have to talk with you,"

So that's it and I hope you liked it. I'm sorry for every spelling or grammar mistake. Please review and tell me what you think.


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